What Should I Do?
How do you know when it is time to euthanize an animal, a cat friend you have raised since he was a wee thing?
Leo is really struggling again. Nothing I feed him seems to help. He acts like he is starving to death. This last week he has been struck with explosive diarrhea. I come home to 4-5 accidents a day. I need to get a SpotBot to clean the carpet. I woke this morning at 4 am to the sound of shit being sprayed not a foot from my head. I have lost 3 pairs of shoes.
I can't find a vet to do a house call. He is vet phobic from all the visits we have had in the last four years. None of the food seems to help. Antibiotics help for a short while. But I am told that chronic diarrhea in some cats is nearly impossible to diagnose and treat. I just sent an email to the vet closest to my houses in hopes she might have some suggestions, but I don't have much hope. Just a whisper.
I am crying as I type this because I can't even believe that I am thinking about putting him to sleep. I ask myself if it is really because he is in pain and in decline or am I just feeling selfish and inconvenienced. I just don't know what to do.
Leo is almost 13. He has been fragile all his life. He probably should never have lived at all. His mother stopped feeding him when he was very young. Do I just say, he has had a good life, better than anything he could have had if we hadn't come together, but now it is time for him to pass? Am I being a selfish, horrid person? And if I have him euthanized because it is the right thing to do, how do I get through this?